For women, squirting comes with its own set of pressures. It seems to have become another "impossible" sexual act we're meant to perform. This not only contributes to sexual shame; it also makes it hard to let go enough to squirt.
Legendary squirting pioneer and sex educator Lola Jean says she tries to stay away from the idea that you can "make" anyone do anything sexually. Instead, think of it more as enabling them to have the experience. "If they don't want to squirt, you're not going [to] make anyone do anything," Jean says.
To get into the right mindset, you need to be sure you're both relaxed and in the mood. Because squirting involves release, being relaxed is key to feeling comfortable enough to let your body do its own thing without tensing up.
"The woman needs to feel safe so she can completely let herself go. She needs to be relaxed, completely present, 100% in her body, and her mind may not be wandering," says licensed sex therapist Moushumi Ghose, LMFT.
Remember that this is about feeling pleasure, not performing for yourself or a partner. Enjoy the sensations your body is feeling and know that while you may not squirt, that's not the main purpose of what you are doing. The main purpose is pleasure.
Once you or your partner are properly aroused, it's time to get to business. For manual stimulation, "the giver inserts fingers into the vagina and applies pressure, rather than friction, to the front wall of the vagina (near her stomach) one and a half to three inches in (every woman is different)," says Kenneth Play, a sex educator who has been teaching people to squirt for years.
Your pelvic floor muscles, also known as your pubococcygeal (PC) muscles, can make a big contribution to squirting. These are a hammock-like set of muscles that hold in your lower organs, from the uterus to the bowels. While having control over them is not an absolute in squirting, it helps.
"When the G-spot is stimulated vigorously, it usually creates a natural tendency to squeeze and pull inward instead of bearing down," he explains. "So, one of the keys to enabling squirting is to learn to bear down during intense G-spot stimulation."
You can also try a female arousal gel, such as one from Promescent. While they can be too intense for some vulva owners, there are some brands that make a very mild, all-natural version that can help promote blood flow to the clitoris and vulva.
Just like you need to be in the right psycho-emotional state to be able to squirt, you need to be open to getting messy. While the amount and propulsion force of squirting liquid varies from person to person, it will very likely end in a mess.
If you're nervous about the mess, simply put down a towel or two before getting busy. If you're feeling extra fancy, you can even buy a sex blanket that is specifically designed for period sex, squirting, and all other manner of sexual fluids. They're pricey, but they're definitely pretty cool.
It's also worth mentioning that while it's sometimes referred to as "female ejaculation," squirting doesn't always present as the gushing explosion you might be envisioning. Squirting is, like so many things in sex, unique for everyone.
"Some squirt leaks, drips, streams, and, yes, some of it ejects," Jean explains. "Squirting can happen during or independent of an orgasm. I like to refer to it as 'sexual applause': Something that's happening is feeling good, leading to a release of fluid."
Squirting takes diligence, patience, and multiple types of stimulation. With the receiver lying on her back, it's easier for the giver to gain access to every part of the body they need in order to produce squirting.
Ghose also suggests standing upright for squirting. Stand against a wall so that you can lean against it for support. Be sure your legs are spread wide enough so your partner has access to your entire vulva and vagina.
Squirting is not quite the same as having an orgasm but still feels orgasmic. Gushing is described as a profoundly satisfying letting go or a total-body relaxing release. A woman may feel warmth and a liberating loss of control combined with a feeling of being utterly care-free for a moment.
Whenever you get close to squirting it will feel like you need to pee. Instead of holding it in, relax through it and let go. Bear down instead of contracting and pulling back. Subsequent gushes usually come more easily after your first one.
The task at hand is to find a stimulation technique that gives you that odd feeling of tension building or the feeling of needing to relieve your bladder. When you find what works, use it during the three stages of squirting we talk about below.
The first time I squirted with a partner, I was riding his dick in a squatting pose. His cock was buried in my pussy. I was grinding against the base of it rubbing against my lips and clit until it made me come hard.
Sean is the editor of Bad Girls Bible and responsible for recruiting our team of sex and relationship experts. When he's not fastidiously checking for proper syntax or fixing bugs on the site, he's working with illustrators to make the Bad Girls Bible more beautiful and ensuring that our weekly email newsletter goes out on time.
Can i drink her squirt juice? And is anal sex without condom safe if she pumps water inside of her rectum b4 sex? Can over simulation of her pussy of eating,fingering,vibrator and squirting all at once hurt her?
My partner and i have been experimenting with squirting. When i go extremely rough with her and then not let her get off my face when she feels the urge to she end up squirting really hard with large amounts. The issue is, its not always squirt, sometimes its actually pee coming out of her. How do you deal with that?
Hi Guysi have a really serious issue my wife is not squirting and not getting an Orgasm i tried every possible way and smilor positions But i still facing that i am FailedTell me what i have to Do ?
Great feedback treed this with my women she said how she had never squirted with any man but after reading this and putting it in motion she had a big squirt for the first time it was great as it came out several times it works
It probably turns her on to have you watch! hopefully you are masturbating at the same time and getting off as well ! Although her seeing you with another man is equally arousing. Just reading this turns me on! LOL ! I think that might be what it takes for me to squirt too! Still trying! my man for sure loves it!Damn you are a good man!! doing whatever it takes to make her happy!? She is lucky!
Beyond urethral ejaculations, there are two types of vaginal emissions: gushing and creaming. When a woman gushes, a significant amount of moisture is released from the vagina during penetration. You may experience this as an immense amount of wetness flowing down your penile shaft or in your hands, or her vaginal walls may become significantly more slippery.
Scientists have even suggested that squirting may have a purpose beyond pleasure: to keep women peeing painlessly post-sex. Some scientists have hypothesised that ejaculatory fluid could flush harmful bacteria out of the urethra after they have made their way up there during intercourse, helping prevent uncomfortable urinary tract infections.
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Whether you're learning how to squirt during partnered or solo play, having the best sex toys for squirting on hand can help. These expert-approved toys can benefit beginners and experienced squirters alike.
Squirting refers to fluid expelled from the vagina during orgasm. Not all people with vaginas squirt during orgasm, and those who do may only squirt some of the time. This type of orgasm includes a rapid ejection of urine from the bladder.
Ejaculation in people with vaginas may include a small release of a milky white liquid that does not gush out. Squirting, on the other hand, is usually a higher volume. It is possible to squirt and ejaculate at the same time.
Each person's experience with squirting is different. While some methods can make people squirt more than others, there is no one proven method that makes every person with a vagina squirt. This is because each vagina is different. As mentioned, some vaginas lack the skene's glands which are thought to create the fluid released during ejaculation in people who have vulvas.
The depiction of squirting in porn movies often shows large gushes of squirting liquid. Porn producers fake some of these depictions for dramatic effect. All volumes and forms of squirting are valid. Squirting at different volumes is a normal occurrence during sex for many people.
Some sex experts recommend stimulating the g-spot to achieve a squirting orgasm. Either by yourself or with a partner, take some time to find the g-spot with your fingers and/or sex toys. Pressure on the g-spot may make you feel the need to urinate.